Wind In My Head: October 2005
Wind In My Head
Monday, October 31, 2005
6/6.2
So, apparently, that's what my left eye is at this point. It's been a long day that started at nine and didn't end till almost four even though I was in post-op at 11.30. It had to do with the classic ineptitude of the public hospital where forms get missing and case files get sent to the wrong clinic- putting Packrat into a foul mood even though he wasn't the one who had an eye that felt suspiciously that someone socked him one. But *pat him on the head* for waiting with me.Highlight of my day- I was something of an exhibit in the operating theatre. I had an anaesthesist who was supposed to keep track of my blood pressure, pulse and other vital signs. He was also the guy who's on standby in case I need to go under for any reason. Anyway, apparently, my pulse read as 40 something and apparently, that's very rare. Me? I was like my pulse is like 40 something? Ok... Is that a good thing?
His reply was "either you're very fit or you have a heart problem".
And then he called his other anaethesists friends over to gawk at my monitor and ask me questions about what I did that made my heart rate 40 something. I let slip (by then, I'd been giving a sedative and wasn't in full control of what I was saying!) that I just ran the Corporate triathlon recently and he asked me whether I did the Ironman. I think I just laughed at him. Anyway, I'm going to revel in the fact that I have a 40 something heart rate now because I'm off any sort of physical activity for 4 weeks so I don't think I'm going to have a heart rate of 40 something for a while after this.
Time to rest my new eye.
Ondine tossed this thought in at 19:16
Bibiks
The long days haven't really ended yet. Only difference is that it isn't so much for work anymore. Today was an extremely long day because it was my cousin's wedding and it was a huge Peranakan do. My cousin and her new husband had to don the ceremonial Peranakn wedding garb. This included a headpiece made of gold and weighing so much that my cousin constantly looked like she had to duck down. Thw costume doesn't inspire any sort of intimacy at all. You can't hold hands and hug one another in that garb. There's too much in the way. This picture, that I pulled off the web shows you how close you can stand to one another without tripping over one another. Not very romantic, but very very cool.
So because it was a Perankan wedding, we all had to dress up. The guys had on Chinese frog button shirts of various colours. Only problem is they kept getting mistaken for waiters. Dan said if anyone asked him for a drink, he'd go get the guy a drink and then tell him, "first one's free, second one, you have got to ask a waiter, dude". I wish he did.
The women, right down to my four year old niece had sarong kebayas on. My mother bought me one with sleeves too short, so I had to take my organza wedding one out of storage and pray very hard that I could still fit into it. Thankfully, I could. And my hairdresser was kind enough to pop in to give me a nice wind-swept look that was held up by half a can of hairspray and ten thousand pins! (It took me a good half hour and four conditioner washes to get all the gunk off!)
I also now have a half wig on my table and every time we walk past it, we inadvertently ask ourselves "Who did we scalp last night? " All in the spirit of Halloween. :)
Ondine tossed this thought in at 00:43
Saturday, October 29, 2005
All Night Long
I have officially been up for 24 hours and 5 minutes. My legs are threatening to give out from under me. On the bright side, I do not have to grade another paper, write or deliver another lecture for the next two months.So what's a bit of exhaustion induced hallucination?
Joy.
Ondine tossed this thought in at 03:04
Friday, October 28, 2005
Scary Soup
Sometime ago, I blogged about the Soup that Gave You Wings. Today, I have a visual.
And it really is as vile as it looks. I still have half more to go. Someone give me a clothes peg and a big pair of lungs!
Ondine tossed this thought in at 04:59
Wilma
While enjoying dinner at Sushi Tei, the heavens descended upon us. There was angry thunder and indignant lightning. It suited my mood perfectly.We knew we were in trouble because we did not have an umbrella, but I was in one of those moods where I think walking in the rain would have been cathartic. Except, you couldn't quite walk in this downpour. You sort of had to wade.
It really seemed as if Hurricane Wilma had stopped by in transit, just to say hi and to have a bit of fun.
Of course, this meant our living room was bathed in rainwater as well. So, there was much cleaning up. On the bright side, Singapore was about 3 degrees cooler. It should always be this way.
Ondine tossed this thought in at 04:51
Thursday, October 27, 2005
Fairy Tale
Once upon a time, there was a little girl who lived in a town surrounded by forest. No one liked the forest very much because they did not trust the big bad wolves that lived in there. This little girl did not care much for those stories. After all, she never ventured into the forest.This little girl enjoyed singing and dancing. She spent many of her days joyfully making up songs and little dance steps to them. Sometimes she got carried away and would end up at the edge of the town, but she was always mindful of never stepping into the forest.
One fine day, her father calls her to his work shack and tells her that the big bad wolves had seen her singing and dancing and wanted her to sing a particular song for them. Apparently, they had taken a liking to it and wanted her to sing specially for them. By this time, the little girl looked petrified. She did not want to sing for the wolves. She only sang and danced when she was happy and she was sure she was not going to be happy doing that in front of the salivating wolves in the forests.
Her father told her she had not much of a choice. They had already seen her and two things could happen. Either she bravely went and sang for them, with her father's knowledge or that they would kidnap her in the middle of the night while her father was asleep.
The little girl was stricken. She knew she had very little of a choice. Her father assured her that if she practiced the song and dance enough and made sure she did not get too close to the wolves, she would be fine. Afterall, he knew where she was going to be.
So, the little girl did as she was told. She practiced long and hard and made sure that she didn't make herself look like a little hamburger on sticks to the wolves. She showed her dance and her song to her father and he thought that she would be safe too.
On the day that she was supposed to perform for the wolves, she tried to remember and do everything her father told her to. The wolves seemed to take all this in stride. They almost ignored her while she performed and did not show any sort of reaction when she was done. They simply nodded to her and told her she could leave.
With a sigh of relief, she turned to leave. She did not know why the wolves behaved the way they did but she did not want to stay around and find out. As she grew closer to the edge of the forest, she wondered less and decided to put it behind her as a strange experience. She told herself that she should not go dance and sing too near the edge of the forest again because she was unsure of whether she would actually make it out alive the second time round.
She saw her home in the distance and could see smoke rising from out the chimney. She thought she could make out her father in the distance, waiting for her. She raised her hand to wave.
Just at that moment, she something hit her back with great force and felt her legs give from under her. Her head hit the ground with a loud thud. Wincing from the pain, she tried to focus on what had attacked her. Even before she could do that, the world around her went black.
The wolf looked up from his prey, limp and torn to shreds. All that was left was her pretty red cape and her dancing shoes. There was nothing he liked better than a moving, unknowing target. He loved plotting and planning these killings. They were always so clueless. They were always so willing to believe that they could outsmart the wolves. So he let them think that, lulling them into a false sense of security, but carefully hatching the plan and pouncing when the moment was right.
She was right about one thing. She never knew what hit her.
And now, he was full. The wolf yawned and stretched lazily. It had been a good hunt. Today, he would just sit back and be contented at the remarkable job he'd done, giving himself a pat on the back. Tomorrow he would start planning his next victim.
The End.
Ondine tossed this thought in at 15:51
Out of this World Logic
In the last 24 hours, I have been exposed to logic that does not resemble earth logic.In response to the phenomenon of global warming-
It's a farce. The ice caps didn't melt, they just moved somewhere else and the scientists lost them, so they claimed that it melted.
In response to a raise in global temperatures-
The thermometer used to measure global temperature is in a weather balloon suspended above a city so the increased temperature is because of the heat that cities generate.
In response to what is the greatest threat to Mankind this century-
It is Man's selfish nature and nothing else. No, you can't discuss terrorism, you can't discuss the degradation of the environment. It's just that Man is selfish.
In response to a radio alert that there were traffic ops on a certain road and there were highway cops setting speed traps-
The government is broke and needs money. And it's almost Christmas and the highway cops need their bonuses so they have to work a little bit harder.
Yup. And absolutely NONE of these came from students.
Amazing, ain't it?
Ondine tossed this thought in at 07:51
Wednesday, October 26, 2005
The Longest Week of My Life
I am reminded of this very annoying Ariston advertisement from a long time ago when Ariston went on and on and on. That's this week for me. It just drags. Perhaps it's the last lot of papers to grade. Perhaps it's because it's the last week of school and it's taken a long time to get here and it seems to be relishing these last few days much to my great disdain.So there's once again great exhaustion, a great feeling of ennui has overcome me. I find no interest and no joy in what I'm doing. There're papers to grade, students to see, rest to be had, food to be eaten, hair to be cut. But no joy. How depressing.
MICHEL: Don't misunderstand. I want to answer it, I truly did, but today, today I am suffering from ennui.
LORELAI: Ennui?
MICHEL: Severe ennui. You know what ennui is, yes?
LORELAI: Yes. Um, Webster's defines ennui as a lazy soon to be out of work French concierge who won't answer the phone.
MICHEL: Look, I've had my peace with the fact that everyone who calls here is a notch above brain dead, and that the pennies I am thrown each week are in exchange for me dealing with these people in a nonviolent manner. And usually that is fine, but today, sorry lady, I have ennui.
LORELAI: So, you're sleepy?
MICHEL: It's a metaphysical angst.
LORELAI: So, you wanna go beddy bye?
MICHEL: You make light, it increases my ennui.
Gilmore Girls- Love, Daisies and TroubadoursThis is probably exacerbated by the fact that I was up at 4 this morning working when all I really wanted was to sleep. I know it's the last stretch before a nice 2 month hiatus of sorts, but why does it always have to be hard leading up to that? It's like it knows that there will be fun to be had in the next 2 months and so it's squeezing and wringing us dry now.
At this point, because of the existential angst I am once again considering grad school, even in Singapore. But that's probably not going to work. Not when money is such an issue. I keep thinking maybe I won't go to grad school because it is just a dream and sometimes we have to live in the real world. But everytime I read something related to language or psychology, my eyes light up again. So perhaps, that really is the solution to this angst.
But for now, a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do and that's to grade papers like a fiend. The marks end up by fiendishly mean as well, but what's a girl with ennui going to do about that? Absolutely nothing.
Ondine tossed this thought in at 13:49
Tuesday, October 25, 2005
Laser Sights Part 1
Yesterday was part 1 of the very expensive 3 part elective eye surgery that I am doing.It's a weird sensation when there's something put in your eye to prevent you from blinking.
It's a weird feeling when this green laser beam zaps your eyeball 30 times (I counted!)
It's an extremely weird feeling when another laser sends out pulses onto your eyeball with pressure that reminds you of little Borneo Dayaks or Ooompaloompahs (in my mind, they look the same) shooting darts into parts of your eye.
But strangely enough, my vision cleared up enough after the procedure to actually see what was going on around me.
Only bad thing? The eye drops. You drip them into your eye and they sneak down your nasal passage to leave a horrid bitter taste at the back of your throat. I'm constantly buzzing from sugar because I keep eating sweets to reduce the awful taste.
Hopefully Part 2 will go smoothly too. That's next Monday.
Ondine tossed this thought in at 08:03
Sunday, October 23, 2005
Poseur
Joey: Go to China. Eat Chinese food.
Chandler: Course there, they just call it food.
"The One where Rachael Finds Out"
Similarly, when a bookstore doesn't have books, it should really just be called a store.
I went to Borders, armed with the 30% off regular priced books coupon. First, I tried to ask for Julian Barnes's The History of the World in 10 1/2 Chapters. And they were out.
So, I try to ask for Steven Pinker's Words and Rules. Once again, strike out.
I have neither now and will have to wait till I go back to Melbourne to buy them. Maybe I'll buy them cheap at Book Affair. That'll be thumbing my nose at Borders.
Bah.
Ondine tossed this thought in at 21:14
Mud Packs
I ran the NB Corporate Triathlon yesterday. It's always fun to do. Unlike last year, I did not get sunburnt, nor did I get a bruised toe nail that needed cauterizing.It was nice cool weather to run, for most of the way at least, since the heavens opened at 3 the night before. Problem with that, mud. Mud everywhere.
The fields were squishy.
At that point, I realised howmuch of a xiao jie* I've grown up to be. There were all these volunteers, teenagers between 14 and 18. They had given up trying to keep their footwear clean and had taken to walking around in the reporting field bare feet and totally muddified. They were totally oblivious to the squish and gunk that was around them. They just trapsed around quite happily, branding us with our team numbers.
And the result of squishy fields and changeover points- from cyclist to runner, was that my shoes were caked in mud and were no longer white and purple. They were just brown. To make matters worse, so were my socks. Never underestimate the power of wet mud, and here, I'm not talking about the glacial mud you put on your face to look beautiful. My socks needed to be soaked in soap powder and scrubbed for it to reclaim any semblance of being a pair of white socks.
The run itself was not bad. It was punishing because I started off too fast. I blame the mud for that too. I had to run out of the changeover pen and I desperately craved solid hard ground under my feet. So, I took off as if ten thousand wild boars were pissed with me for invading their mudbath. And by the time my feet hit hard ground, I felt like I'd run half the race already.
I think I registered a good time, but I won't know till the official times are out. I do know that I spent the rest of the day in a daze and went to bed at 9 last night.
Thank goodness I'm not running the StanChart Marathon this year.
*xiao jie- Wanting to always remain pristine and not dirty like boys. =)
Ondine tossed this thought in at 12:17
Friday, October 21, 2005
Misled
When you spend the entire afternoon sitting in the waiting room of a doctor's office, your mind ends up wandering and you inadvertently pick up snippets of conversation. The most interesting bits involved nurses.Nurse 1: Must book anesthesist otherwise cannot do caesarian.
Nurse 2: Yah, see who is available.
Nurse 1: Anyone also can lah. Look at her, she's going to explode ready!
The woman in question, looked extremely miserable. I would too, if I was walking around looking like I swallowed an inflated fitball.
Another conversation was news to me and it promptly reminded me of how television land is fictitious.
Nurse: This bottle is for your husband (hands woman at counter an empty bottle)
Woman (blankly): What is he supposed to do with it?
Nurse: First he must substain (read: abstain) for 3 days. And then he must do it in the bottle.
Woman: Where? At home?
Nurse: At home can, but must deliver in one hour. Wait got traffic jam, then all wasted!
Woman: Is there a room here for him to do it?
Nurse: The toilet lor!
Woman: What???
Nurse: Yah, most of our husbands do it in the toilet.
Right. You heard it here. Poor men who have to deposit a specimen have to do it in the toilet. There is no room. And I was led to believe, by many television shows and the One with the Fertility Test, that there would be a room for such purposes and there was porn in the room to, erm, aid the process. Possibly the only place in Singapore that would have legal porn. But apparently, no. Not even to aid the nation's plummeting birth rates is there porn. Not even for medical purposes. The poor men have to stare blankly at the white tiles of the Men's room with is fluorescent lighting. How sad.
Of course, Packrat had greater concerns. He now has to go to the Men's toilet on another floor because it's put bad images into his head. Actually, it has in mine as well, but I don't have to go the Men's Room.
Ondine tossed this thought in at 23:56
Tuesday, October 18, 2005
Upside Down
The first thing my sweet Packrat did when he was done with his marking was to go out there and buy me flowers. It looks weird because I'm standing on a chair and trying to take the picture. But they are very pretty and very blog worthy.
Ondine tossed this thought in at 14:09
Parting is Such Sweet Sorrow
So, I've sent off my first bunch of students, ever. How do I feel?Frankly, exhausted.
There was the farewell assembly that stretched for like 3 hours. There were good byes, there were tears, there were thank yous, there were countless photos, where I felt like my Buffy cardboard cutout. Students came, stood, smiled, posed and went, while I stood still. I realised at that point the reason why some teachers become old and ornery. Because they stay on. Their students go on and become great people, successful in their own fields and when they go back to school, their teachers are still there. They haven't gone anywhere. The students become the same, the students all begin to look alike. You're slowly unable to distinguish one group from another. And that's when you become disilluioned. Well, some become disilluioned much earlier than that, but there are always reasons.
But, thankfully, that wasn't where I was today. You see these kids, for the two years that they are here and are bitching about how much they hate the school, get sentimental and teary. Teachers well up and choke up when we are asked to pay tribute to the students who stood out and everyone, for once, forgets to be cool and sings the College anthem for once. Loudly. Pity they didn't get there any earlier. But I guess, they wouldn't be doing 18 year olds justice if they had figured things out any earlier.
And then there was a reception. Much food. Laced with MSG.
And then there was a dedication ceremony for the sportsmen.
Then there was more food.
So the perfect sendoff. Songs, tears, laughter, lots of food and now, the bleeding out of the high. Next, the collapse of exhaustion. Perhaps during psych, in less than 2 hours time. If I make it there, that is.
Ondine tossed this thought in at 13:39
Sunday, October 16, 2005
Soup that Gives you Wings
I feel sick.My mother presented me with a somewhat foul looking concoction that I was supposed to drink because it was good for me. Usually I get just chicken soup but today, she was adventurous and had bought a packet of dubious looking herbs from the medicinal hall for me. Apparently, it's supposed to warm me up. She has been quite concerned about the fact that I get cold easily. And get cold as in lips and hands and finger nails turn a brighter shade of purple. So out of the goodness of her heart, she decides to warm me up.
Except, the soup is black! And you can smell it from the lift landing! Did I tell you the soup was black? Anyway, only I alone was to eat it. She remarked rather ominously that Packrat could not eat it unless he wanted to grow some breasts. And I like my men bra-less so, no, I had to finish it. 2 big bowls of it. After which, I was quite ready to throw up although I was ordered not to since she had spent the whole afternoon brewing it and it would just be a waste to see it in reverse projectile.
I kept it down and desperately craved something sweet like cake to get the foul, bitter taste out of my mouth. My bro cut a Chinese pear which I immediately pounced on since it was allegedly sweet. But it was taken away almost just as immediately because it was cooling and I had just had soup that was heaty and we didn't want to negate the effects. I think I looked like a child whose ice cream was taken away from her on accord of her coughing. *much indignance*
Apparently, part deux will be next week. But she promises it will be less, in quantity, not in bitterness. So I have a week to get this tast out of my mouth. Next week, I will have ice cream on hand.
Bleagh.
Ondine tossed this thought in at 22:58
Thursday, October 13, 2005
*Waves*
A shout out to all the students who surreptitiously and not so surreptitiously read my blog. Welcome to a blog where words are spelt in full and sentences have some semblance of syntax. :)Don't be a stranger.
Ondine tossed this thought in at 19:17
Subscription Girl
So apparently, I'm famous now, courtesy of Lisa Montgomery (where's my free copy? I should start charging model fees!) . I epitomise the jetsetting baby tai-tai crowd apparently. Right. I wish they'd send me to Mauritius right about now.
Ondine tossed this thought in at 10:27
Ugly Muffin
We've got muffins from Cedele this morning at work the don't look very pretty but they sure taste very good sugar buzz now and i have to go try to teach just found out that my classes have topped the bottom of the table so it's extremely depressing and hence the need for the sugar buzz or I'd go homicidal on them now.
Buzz.
Ondine tossed this thought in at 10:16
Wednesday, October 12, 2005
Rock, Hard Place, Me.
My eyes are very blurry. I've been in front of the lap top the whole day, first vetting essays and subsequently, writing testimonials. It's a slow process and my eyes are protesting.I haven't decided whether the procedure is worth the money yet. Many other things hang in tandem with this decision. It's awful when a decision has to be made with other decisions that have to be made but have not yet been made in mind.
That's a really long sentence but my brain has turned veritable mush and I've decided that I shall write this entry blind. In that, I'm writing it with my eyes closed. It's the only way I'm resting my eyes. I could go to sleep but that would be the logical thing to do, wouldn't it? And it's dark out, so there is no point in looking out the window into the distance.
Ondine tossed this thought in at 00:23
Tuesday, October 11, 2005
Tea Zone
Packrat and I decided to go on a lunch date today. We aren't usually able to have lunch together because we're normally still at work. But since my eyes were still recovering from having air puffed into it, psychedelic whirling lights out of Austin Powers spinning in my periphary vision, eye drops dripped into my eyes to numb my eyeballs to the mechanical pencil looking device that would measure the thickness of my cornea and to round it off, more eyedrops to dilate my already large pupils, I had the day off and Packrat was a 5 minute drive away, we went to lunch.We've been to Essential Brew for drinks before. Essentially, they serve tea. And their food menu is tea inspired as well. Our lunch today consisted of
One Jasmine Rice Ball which is white rice infused with jasmine tea (Very fragrant)
One Grilled tofu steak topped with mushrooms marinated in tea sauce and tea leaves (Yum!)
One plate of Oolong drumettes braised in Oolong tea sauce
One T-Jazz drink which was lemongrass and Jasmine tea
One Vera Breeze which was a blended Kiwi, apple and green tea drink.
And the menu proudly proclaimed the benefits of tea drinking. Catechins which are antioxidants and the presence of Vitamin C, E and Zinc. No need to drink cooking oil already.
So, we've had our daily dosage of essential minerals and are in the zone.
Ondine tossed this thought in at 20:26
Comfort Dreams
I have a penchant for strange dreams. My subconscious has a mind of its own and I've dreamt about the weirdest things. Last week, I dreamt that my principal and I were playing a practical joke on someone and I was laughing so hard, I woke up laughing. On other occasions, I've dreamt of people giving birth to puppies, cartoon character coming to life, you name it, I've pretty much dreamt it.Sometimes I dream of being back in primary school. I'm an adult, squashed into those tiny tables and chairs. Usually these dreams have some anxiety in it. I'm taking an exam, I'd forgotten to hand in homework or I'd plain forgotten how to speak Chinese (which isn't too far fetched!). I never realise that I'm actually anxious about something till I have school dreams.
And then, there're the comfort dreams. Like comfort food, just more ethereal, long lasting and calorie free. And they're often about houses. Houses that I've lived in before. Never the ones that I currently live in. Perhaps that's a case of not knowing what I've got till I don't have it anymore.
I've been feeling very very blue lately. And it's hard to talk about, it's hard to put a pulse on it. I'm mostly okay during the day because I'm busy, but when I'm alone or have settled down for the day, it hits me quite hard. There's a lot of hurt involved, hurt from within and from people who really don't know that what they've said has hurt me. Hopefully, they never will know. But still, it stings, it bugs me and it weighs heavily on what I may have to do in the next few months. And it all depresses me.
I guess of all things, my subconscience in the best position to be aware of my state of emotional dissonance. And it did its best to provide me with solace, by putting my grandmother's house into my dreamscape. It was a rambling pre-war house that had every pest under the sun. Lizards, mosquitoes by the hoards, white ants, moths certain times of the year, everything. But it was a home that everyone in my extended family had lived in at one point or another. When she passed away and it had to be sold, my mother and her sisters dreamt about their grandmother giving them a hard time about selling it. My cousins and I talked longingly about finding 2 million dollars to buy it and keep it within the family. Everyone had some attachment to it. The tiles were from 1940. So were the doors and windows. The mosiac tiles and the rough walls (apparently to keep the lizards away, but the house lizards must have grown little Spidey hooks on the feet pads because they still scuttled around) that were rough to the touch but soothed the soul.
So I dreamt we lived there, as if we never left. It wasn't a visit into the past because Packrat's marking lay on the table. And there wasn't much going on in the dream that I remember. Just sitting and talking and being in the house. I still woke up blue this morning but when I walked past our dining room table with Packrat's marking on it, I realised that for a few precious hours last night, I wasn't blue and I was quite contented and it was enough for now.
Ondine tossed this thought in at 08:07
Monday, October 10, 2005
Poll
Would you spend close to $6000 to fix eyes that are legally blind?Ondine tossed this thought in at 22:40
Sunday, October 09, 2005
The Nanny
Packrat's taken refuge in the bedroom. I've discovered that the Hallmark channel is running a The Nanny marathon. It's so bad and I love watching it! The nasal voice, the butler, the fake British accent, the bad humour. What better way to spend a Sunday afternoon? =)Ondine tossed this thought in at 14:56
My New Pet.
| adopt your own virtual pet! |
Ondine tossed this thought in at 13:46
Mothers.
My mother has discovered the Internet. Well, actually she discovered the computer and the magical hours of fun she could have actually playing Spider Solitaire. My mother is very easily entertained.Anyhow, because of her precocious grandson, my precocious nephew, she's also discovered the Internet. So she rings up Threez last night.
Mom: How to go to that map place?
Threez: What map place?
Mom: You know, that one where you can get maps?
Threez: Er, Streetdirectory.com?
Mom: Yah, that one.
Threez: Ok, open the icon with the big E.
Mom: Ok. -pause- But it says Open when I click it.
Threez (eternally patient): click the right button twice. Very fast.
Mom: Ok. But it is a Goggle page.
Threez: Ok, you must go to the white bar on top and type in the address.
Mom: How to cancel what's there?
Threez: Delete it.
Mom: How to delete it?
Threez: Hit the delete key.
Mom: I can't find it.
Threez: It's on the top right hand corner.
Mom: Don't have. Got Page Up, Page down, F12, F11...
Threez: Look further down.
Mom: Ohhh! Found it. Ok. And then?
Threez: Type in www.streetdirectory.com.sg
Mom: Ok. w-w-w.... where's the fullstop?
Threez: Bottom right hand corner.
Mom: Don't have! Got two dots.
Threez: That's the colon! Look further.
Mom: Ok, I try this. Ok.
Mom: Wait! It says the it does not exist!
Threez: Tell me what you typed in.
Mom: I typed in what you told me to.
Threez: Ok. Spell it for me.
Mom: I typed, www.streetdirectorydotcomdotsg. That's what you told me to type!
......
Yup, my mom, who wanted to know where China Club was. All she had to do was actually ask Threez specifically where it was and Threez could have told her.
But 10 points to my mother for her attempting to keep up with the times. 100 points to Threez for her unending patience.
Ondine tossed this thought in at 12:41
Close Encounters of the Real Kind
In the last few weeks, it's become clear to me that being 18 is no fun. There's so much to contend with. Studying for exams, taking exams, the harrowing wait for the results of the exams to be released, realising the results really suck, taking more exams in preparation and in the hope that the real one won't be so bad and so on and so forth. It's never ending really.Add to that, the emotional problems of being 18. The different camps of people, the cliques, the politics of the cliques. Raise it a notch, add in boys or girls, into the fold. Being infatuated, perhaps even to the point of being delusional, hoping for what cannot actually be, clinging, wanting a relationship because you think it's the only way out of the lonely shit hole you think you're in. Discovering that that in itself, brings with it more problems, more insecurities. Worrying about it, obsessing about it. Googling people to try to find out just a little bit more about the parties invovled. The misguided belief that information gives you power. And not realising that obsessing, worrying, searching, deconstructing, pseudo-psycho analysing, all take time. Time at this point that none have.
Perhaps that's why my parents were adamant about the fact that I shouldn't date when I was that age. It was detrimental for me too, but I'm thankful I didn't throw out my whole academic career the way some of these kids might end up doing. I remember discovering that the boy I was seeing, was physically involved with someone else. I remember discovering this in the midst of a very important series of exams. I remember obsessing about it, trying to find out who she was, why she was doing what she was doing, why she seemed more attractive than I was, why he liked her more than he liked me (although I think that was actually quite clear to me). And all this, I did , before the advent of the Internet, Google and Technorati. The amount of time I spent, the ups and the downs, not funny. The subsistence on an apple a day, very not funny- skeleton with skin would have been an apt description. Anyway, it took time, time that I should have used, to study, to make sure that I did well. I didn't realise I wasn't doing that. I think I was far too caught up in it to realise how adverse the effects were on me.
Till much later anyway and then I asked myself, what in the world was I thinking? Thank goodness, the damage was minimal. The results were still passable and respectable and no one thought much of it. But I knew. I knew, inside me, how much better it could have been. And how silly I'd been.
Now, that's what I see going around me. And I am powerless to stop it. They choose their own paths of self-destruction and it gathers speed and momentum and they fall further, farther and deeper into the abyss. What to do? Hope they learn from it? What if this costs them more than they can afford? How do you help them?
At the same time, I'm desperately trying to teach the same kids about the Singapore government and the meaning of patriachy. How in Singapore, we are treated like young children. Not being capable of thinking for ourselves, of being told how to think and what is the right way to think about things. I'm trying to impress upon them that it's very much like how parents try to prevent us from making mistakes because they know better and even if it really is out of the goodness of their heart, sometimes, it's just something we have to learn for ourselves and they have to take a step back and let us figure it out for ourselves. Perhaps more is at stake when it comes to a society, but the main point is to trust that people make the right decisions and learn from it. Problem is there are too many people who just don't think and we need to stop them from being destructive. So, it's a chicken and egg dilemma.
I guess I can tell them what to do and insist that they do it by the authority invested in me by the Ministry of Education (hahaha). But they probably wouldn't listen and resent me for it. I can also give them carte blanche to do what they want, hope they realise what they're doing and perhaps wake up their ideas a bit. And if they don't, hope they pick themselves up and make the best of what they have? Hope they get a second chance later on?
Lives are so easy to screw up and there's so damn little anyone can do about it. And the sucky thing about it, is, damned if you do and damned if you don't.
Ondine tossed this thought in at 09:30
Saturday, October 08, 2005
IDD Rates
Plentyfish has been SMS-ing the UK quite a bit lately. CY is now working in London and it's the cheapest way for them to keep in touch. She doesn't have any sort of Internet connection in her serviced apartment, so they can't Skype. So he rings Singtel to find out how much it would cost to SMS the UK.This was the conversation.
Plentyfish: How much is it to SMS London?
Singtel: Wait ah, I find out.
Plentyfish: Erm...
Singtel: 17p
Plentyfish: ???? Wa....??
Singtel: Ya, 17 p.
Plentyfish: 17p??
Singtel (getting frustrated even though he didn't have a right to) : Yes, 17 p. 17 pesos!
Plentyfish: pesos???
Singtel: Yes, it's 17pesos to call London.
Plentyfish: From the Philippines?
Singtel: har? It's 17 pesos lah. P-E-S-O-S!
Plentyfish: Right.
So apparently, Singtel is really going regional and we're charging in pesos because it's good business sense to do that?
Go figure. It is Singtel.
Ondine tossed this thought in at 21:19
Wednesday, October 05, 2005
SBO vs FBO
Inspired by Tym's What's in your bag? post I decided to empty the contents of my bag onto the bed. This is what I found.
1. Wallet
2. Tissue packet
3. Two phones- one work phone and a regular one.
4. Credit card holder because my wallet is too small to hold all my cards.
5. A pill box with my vitamins
6. A toiletries bag with pink panadols (what else would you expect?), 3 different lip colours and a lip balm, a hair brush, a compact, eye drops and a variety of other things.
Then I realised, this is actually quite light. It's just the neccessities and when I go to work, I carry this and usually another bag to store other things. So I decided, this was akin to the Skeletal Battle Order. Just the bare bones edition.
And on the weekend, surprisingly enough, the bag contains a heck of a lot more stuff.
1. Bigger bag
2. Sweater- at work, I have a jacket sitting on my chair. On the weekend, I'm likely to be in a shopping mall that seems sub-artic to me.
3. Ipod- especially when I have to work outside.
4. A book- especially when I'm pretending to be one of the masses and use our public transport system (this happens a lot and I suspect it's going to happen more now that there is ERP on Saturday in the city)
5. Same as above, wallet and credit card holder, toiletries bag, tissue packet, 2 phones, pill box and car keys.
6. Add to that, a water bottle because I drink like a fish ( I have no idea where the analogy comes from and I'm not even sure if it's accurate because fish don't really drink water but anyway....)
7. A pen- Donno, just in case.
8. Sunglasses- I am more likely to be out in the open during the weekend than during the week when I'm stuck in classrooms and sub-artic staff offices where the sun don't shine.
9. Umbrella- we live in sunny Singapore where the weather is as temperamental as I am PMS-ing.
So there, the Full Battle Order. With that, I can weather anything. Well, almost anything in a peaceful, urban environment.
Ondine tossed this thought in at 08:07
Monday, October 03, 2005
Too Free
Dear Mr Hacker,Seeing that you seem to have so much free time on your hands, why don't you go and help the poor little girls being sold off to slavery and prostitution? Or perhaps you could go do something to prevent those poor sharks from writhing in pain as they sink to the bottom of the sea having been gaffed and all their fins sliced off to make tasteless soup served in fine Chinese dining?
I can think of so many things better for you to do than to hack into and remove a post from my blog. I wrote about being Ill Disciplined and procrastinating. I celebrated my new blogskin. Some of the inexhaustible trivialities of life. Not much to concern yourself over.
You're like one of those little gnomes in the Weasley's garden. Even though Packrat cast a password protect spell on his blog, we underestimated how hardy you were and how persistent and pesky you could be. Throwing you far far away just means it takes slightly more time for you to boomerang and hurtle right back, at top speed right to bite and snap at our ankles again. So looks like we'll need to call upon greater more complicated enchantments, just to make sure you mind your own bloody business.
Thank you.
Indignant blogger.
Ondine tossed this thought in at 21:51
Bad Engrish
In the spirit of a mistake I made in the previous post (see Tym's comment) and inspired by the ludicrous mistakes made by my students, I have decided to put myself in my student's shoes.It seemed that the teachers was very busy this morning discussing about the bad examination results. They seemed to have so much stuffs in their mind and I think our behaviours had made them anger with us. I guess I shouldn't be watching so much of the television and my friends, the atheletes should be more time studying the spirting up and down the track.
But I really don't know how to study my GP. I am having a dead end and everyone's mindset is dismoralised already. Maybe, today I going home to read the newpaper and learn some facts. I know that Singapore is a small dot in the globe but is giving aids to many countries and Indonesia is being hazy all the time. Africa is very poor but the people are very happy. And this is better than in Turkey because there got on Turkey driving his van into the Jewish Muslim synagogue. I have also learn that blogging is very seductive and you can be prisoned. I agree to the idea of prisoning the seductive blogger because otherwise Singapore will become violated country.
As a results, I am hence prepared to study very hard to learn more useful informations to use in my GP composition and hopefully my teacher will not critise the composition for being knowing nothing.
Ondine tossed this thought in at 11:57
Early Morning Quiet
I've always been a morning person. I work better in the mornings and I am more able to get up to work then than to stay up late into the night. The last few mornings have been extremely early ones, with reports to rush. It never just stops at the grading of papers. After the grading, there're the reports and after the reports, there's the post mortems and after that, there'll be more grading to make sure that they read the reports and listened at the post mortem. It's vicious and never ending.One good thing about having to get into college extremely early this morning was that the roads were extremely empty and seeing the sky change while you're on the Sheares Bridge, just puts one into a calm serene mood. Very pleasant.
Of course, it didn't last that long because the grades came in today and they were truly abysmal, abominable, atrocious, crummy, down right the pits. It really wouldn't matter if I had tossed the papers up in the air and given them an arbitary grade.
So, I'm annoyed as hell. Plus I'm having to wear glasses this entire week. The evil eye will be working full time this week.
Ondine tossed this thought in at 11:20
Sunday, October 02, 2005
Spook
No, I'm not referring to you, Kev. We set the video to record Gilmore Girls, right about now. And about five minutes ago, the television just popped on. On its own. Packrat's asleep, so he didn't switch it on and I wasn't anywhere near the television set either.All this while I mull over the arguments needed for an essay question about the apparent amount of trash that is shown on television these days.
Someone's trying to tell me something...
Ondine tossed this thought in at 18:00
Saturday, October 01, 2005
Surprise!
Contrary to popular belief, I have ventured in to Carl's Jr and have actually bought something from it, for myself, to eat, without seeing it in reverse projectile.Of course, it is the Low Carb version, but hey, baby steps. Baby steps.
Carl's Jr
Originally uploaded by thelanguishingcat.
Ondine tossed this thought in at 20:56
An Anorexic's lunch?
Inside the Low Carb wrapper.Is this the fabled head of iceberg lettuce that I'm supposed to be eating together with copious amounts of iced lemon tea according to Packrat's discovery in Some Funny Crap?
Read On.
Ondine tossed this thought in at 20:52
Secret Revealed
Daily Recommended Requirements for an adult:
Total Calories: 2000
Carbohydrates: 300g
Fat: 65g
Saturated fat: 20g
Cholestrol: 300mg
Sodium: 2400mg
How much the burger with bread instead of lettuce would set you back-
Total Calories: 920 (Balance for the rest of the day- 1080)
Carbohydrates: 53g (Balance- 247g)
Protein:48g (Balance- 2g)
Fat: 57g (Balance- 8g)
Saturated Fat: 21g (Balance- negative 1g)
Cholestrol: 160mg (Balance- 140mg)
Sodium: 1490mg (Balance- 910mg)
And I did have home made brewed iced-tea, that I am not supposed to, with at least a third of it made out of syrup.
I think I need to go running tomorrow.
Ondine tossed this thought in at 20:49