Tuesday, November 02, 2010

Seeking lost love

I received this in my email this evening.

HELLO,

How are you? i hope you are fine, My name is Miss sintia, my heart is seeking for a true lover that will bring joy and happiness back in my life,I am looking for a long term relationship in a man of your kind who understands the need to love and be loved(Remember the distance or colour does not matter but love matters a lot in life)i am waiting for your reply so that i will send you my picture for you to know who i am,Take care and have a nice time.
Miss sintia.

My response:

HELLO back,
My name is Ondine and I am flattered that you have sought me out to be the true lover that will bring you joy and happiness. I'm sure I could make someone happy but I'm not sure how happy you are going to be when you discover that I am really, in all senses of the word, not. a. man. It is good that you are non-discriminating; that distance (from what?) and colour doesn't count. So, it is okay that I like pink and wear nothing but pink? Let me tell you about myself. I have terrible teeth in my terrible jaws and a poisonous wart at the end of my nose. I also have purple prinkles all over my back. And oh! I'm pretty sure I have bad breath too. But it shouldn't bother you since I'm a distance away and it doesn't matter what colour I am.
I had a nice time talking to you.

Ondine.


Totally bizarre. I wish I could have written the response in Spanish which was what the first part of the email was written in.

Ondine tossed this thought in at 23:39

2 thoughts...

2 thoughts...

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