Wind In My Head: I'm out to get me
Wind In My Head
Sunday, July 13, 2008
I'm out to get me
This post has been updated because I'm still out to get me.This week's been a weird week for me. It's almost as if the forces are having it out and using me as their battlefield. In 4 days, I've managed to unintentionally hurt myself three times and once more through no effort on my . Not drastic enough to seek any treatment but painful enough to send me blinking away tears.
Attempt 1
Thursday night- After having dinner with my ex-colleague, I come home to a locked front door. Swearing at the fact that I looked at my house keys in the afternoon and decided that it wasn't necessary to bring them, I ring Packrat. I knew he was home. I could see the light on in our bedroom. But ten redials later, I resign myself to the fact that unless I throw my pack of scripts high up and accurately enough at the window, he's not going to let me in. Thankfully we live in a house and there are windows that I could possibly climb into with minimal problem. It helps that I spent my adolescent years climbing in and out my bedroom window. Unfortunately, when I round the corner of the house, I slam full force into a wooden bench that is just the right height to make full contact with my knee cap. Because I was trying to get into the house quick, I had rounded the corner quick so physics would have it that the amount of force I was propelling forward and the amount of force the bench was stopping was an immense one. Enough for me to double over, see white searing pain, have my head and knee throb at the same time and wonder if I had just smashed my knee cap into smithereens.
Needless to say, by the time I made it up to the bedroom after having climbed in through the kitchen window with a throbbing knee that would bear no weight, I was in a foul mood. Apparently, when I flung the door wide open, I had the most evil of glints in my eyes and my nostrils were near flaring. Even though I hadn't intended to pick a fight, the pain was driving me to yell and find someone to thump. And poor Packrat wondered what hit him.
My knee is still bruised. I don't think anything's shattered but I can't kneel or crawl on it. Something I didn't do much of pre-kids but do a whole lot of now.
Attempt 2
This just happened. I'm not sure whether it's more or less dramatic than Attempt 1 but the pain is just about the same. I was going to sit on the floor. Lowering my bum onto the floor, either I'd misjudged how much space I had or I'd forgotten that there was a chair behind me, I lower myself, once again at top speed, right down onto the corner of the chair. This time, it wasn't the knee but the tail bone, right smack on the corner. My bum eventually finds the floor and I sit there breathless from the effort of not yelping or showing any sort of expression on my face since Jordan was in front of me and I didn't want to scare her. Now I feel I need a doughnut to sit down. I think the area's bruised and some muscle has been traumatised as well. This time, I don't blame Packrat or yell at anyone but the tears did well up again.
Attempt 3
The least dramatic but the one with the most long drawn pain. A headache that I wake up with and go to bed with. I haven't taken anything for it because I have deadlines to meet and cannot afford to sleep more than I am. I look forward to some drug induced sleep. Sleep that is not broken by the thought of whether to get up and get work done even though the luminous glow of the clock tells me it's only 3 in the morning. I usually don't heed that crazy voice in me. But this morning I did and I'm paying for it now.
Attempt 4
In an attempt to rush and get to class on time, with mountains of work on my desk, I accidentally hit my bottle of water that promptly rolls off and lands on my foot with a clunk. This would not have been so bad except for the fact that my bottle is a one litre bottle and it's a Nalgene- made of hard plastic and some say bulletproof. Needless to say, I wasn't wearing Kevlar tipped boots so my foot's not pleased with me.
I look forward to Tuesday. Tomorrow's the deadline so come hell or high water, all the work should be complete by tonight, despite the busted knee, the bruised butt, busted foot and the throbbing head. Well, that is if the head doesn't explode before I'm done. I am afterall, out to get me.
I should really just lock myself in a padded room so I don't end up killing myself. But the way things are going, I'll probably find an ingenious way of hurting myself there too!
Ownself sabo ownself.
Ondine tossed this thought in at 15:16
1 thoughts...
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At 10:42 pm
Wes & Jo said... as packrat would say "self pwned" :p
you sound tired. take care ya? =) wes