Wednesday, September 06, 2006

Monthly Dose of Useless Information

Every month without fail, I learn things that clog up the limited space that is my mind. Warning, this might be too much information for some of the guys out there. So if you're irksome about even thinking of girls having periods, stop reading now. And, get over it already.

Anyway, everytime I go to Australia, I buy Libra pads. I don't know why I do that. Perhaps it's because I hate the pad brands in Singapore. Perhaps, it's because Libra pads come in pretty non-pad like wrapping and colours. Perhaps because it's more comfortable. Or perhaps, it's just more entertaining.

You see, on the back of every pad, from liner all the way to the super duper all night long-stretch from the top of the butt all the way down and up to the belly button- pad, there's this little bit of sticker paper on the back, where the adhesive bit is. And it's not just regular sticker paper, it's sticker paper with fun facts like the underside of each Snapple cap. Like the last Snapple drink I had taught me that "the Mona Lisa had no eyebrows".

So Packrat usually knows when it's that time of the month because I'd suddenly be a fountain of useless information for a couple of days. It also makes the generally crappy week pass by quicker with just that little bit more of a sense of humour. And now, Packrat's actually doing period math so that he'll know when he has to be prepared for a week of non-sequiturs. And I usually have a lot.

Just look.
libra sticker paper

And that's just one pad. Multiply that by the number one goes through in the few days and it's really a whole lot of rubbish. You could technically write a story with it. Of course, it'd be a total balderdash that only makes sense in the dream dimension. Because it would sound like this.

There was once a girl who was 126 cm tall. She had a friend whose long legs were her entire height and holds some world record for that. Both the freakishly long legged girl and short friend had this one bone in their throat called the hyoid which is the only bone in the body not connected to any other. Because they were weird, they lived in Australia, the only country that is a continent. They ate a great amount of honey because it was the only food that didn't spoil. They had a horse named Mr Ed who could sleep standing up. They rode him to school in the mornings and this morning, they learnt that the number 4 is the only number in the English language that has as many letters in its meaning as it does in its letters.


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Ondine tossed this thought in at 23:14

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