Sunday, October 01, 2006

All growed up

This was taken off Tym's blog because it's Sunday afternoon and I don't want to think.

How grown up am I? Let me count the ways.

1. Your house plants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them.

Erm, we don't have plants. The closest we had to it was a basil plant I bought from the supermarket because I wanted some herb leaves. It died pretty quickly.

2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question.

Well, yes, unless the original intention was to fall on the floor and not want to do it at all.

3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge.

We don't like beer. Now, if it was based on how many bottles of vodka we have in the freezer, then we're in business.

4. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed.

Yes it has been for at least a good 20 years of my life (give and take a couple when I was too little to go to school and in uni). That's why I desperately need a new job.

5. You hear your favorite song on an elevator.

My elevator has a computerised voice that goes "Storey 2, going up."

6. You watch the Weather Channel.

Don't have it in Singapore! But I do look at the Weather Network from time to time to figure out if I could temporarily take out my winter clothes...even if it's just for a day.

7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of hook up and break up.

Like I tell my single male friends who are a tad desperate, most of the women I hang out with are married and a large number of them are happily married. So mostly married, none yet divorced, some doing the hook up and break up, some swearing celibacy and the monastery as the way to go.

8. You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14.

I still have more vacation days than the regular worker bee at my age. My only gripe is that it comes with a whole lot of strings attached and the blood pressure usually hits the point where an aneurysm is possible before the vacation comes round. So, often, it's a matter of surviving up till the break, in every sense of the word.

9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as "dressed up."

Nope, jeans are not "dressed up". But I dress them up on Fridays so that I can wear them to work and still be presentable enough should I happen to have to meet and have to act all growed up for a parent.

10. You're the one calling the police because those damn kids next door won't turn down the stereo.

Oh, I did this when I was 23. Does that mean I was an adult then already? But then again, it was a rave party in a garage that faced my bedroom and on an ecstasy high, those parties could go on forever. And I had an exam the next morning.

11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.

This has been happening since I was 12. An aunt took out a copy of Playboy and showed my cousin and I an x rated comic about some chick going to the barber.

12. You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.

I have never eaten at a Taco Bell! But I do know where the 24 hour MacDonald's are. Super important when you have an Iced Lemon Tea addiction.

13. Your car insurance goes down and your payments go up.

Er, when it comes to the car, I pretend to be a helpless belle. :)

14. You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonalds leftovers.

We have no dog. But when we did, it ate mee siam off the table and cleaned up yoghurt cartons.

15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.

Nope, it just makes me super hot and angsty. Why sleep on the couch if I have a nice comfy KING bed and a tv in the room...although I am known to fall asleep on the couch while watching tv, but that's NEVER intentional. I ALWAYS want to know what happens in between the start credits and the end ones.

16. You no longer take naps from noon to 6 PM.

Actually, it's a habit I'm trying to get into. Damn the totally active mind that refuses to go into siesta mode.

17. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of one.

Um, yeah, but primarily because there's work the next day. Boo.

18. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 AM would severely upset, rather than settle your stomach.

Chicken wings are the best! Anytime of day or night.

19. You go to the drug store for ibuprofen and antacid, not condoms and pregnancy tests.

Nope, neither. And I think it's cheaper to buy pregnancy tests online.

20. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "pretty good stuff".

Well, it is if you're using it to cook clams for pasta.

21. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.

Yes, Packrat and I were just having a rather spirited argument about having clams (see above link) for breakfast. I also added ice cream to the list.

22. "I just can't drink the way I used to," replaces, "I'm never going to drink that much again."

Erm, I generally don't drink enough to get me to that point. All I remember was my first year in Melbourne, feeling very sick after 6 Lemon Ruskis in a row and apologising profusely to Packrat through the night.

23. 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.

Well, less than that, by just a little bit but that's because I multitask and I IM, read blogs, read forums and spoilers all while trying to do serious work.

24. You drink at home to save money before going to a bar.

I drink anywhere that will serve me iced lemon tea in copious amounts.

25. You read this entire list looking desperately for one sign that doesn't apply to you and can't find one to save your sorry old ass.

No comment.

Incidentally, Happy Children's Day!

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Ondine tossed this thought in at 18:07

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